New Home Forums Community, Engagement & Gamification Stop selling to the Fearful Broken Self…start selling to…?

8 replies, 9 voices Last updated by  Luma Malone 8 years ago
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    Catherine Fox

    Had a breakthrough moment thanks to Luma today while we sat on a blanket drinking tea. I was bemoaning the latest ecourse I found on a topic that actually is really close to what lights me up and gets me excited (nervous system transformation) being presented in the old school model –

    – free 3 video course….then get a horrible FAKE-PERSONAL ‘I’ve been thinking about you and want to give you this amazing thing” email leading to a cheaper “21 day program instead of the 12 week program” lead page here:
    21 Day Nervous System Tune Up

    I get the feeling the woman is genuine, and the learning is important. But why do I feel so turned off and sick reading this..?

    Luma noted that the energy signature of these things is based on appealing to the Broken Self. All these selling tips at talking to the desperate/broken/not good enough/you’ve tried everything and nothing works and now here’s the answer sort of thing. I thought the “healing trauma” lady was quite positive but when I looked back at the page, sure enough after getting you excited WHAM here is the section of “YOU REALLY NEED THIS NOW BECASE” and listing all the ways you are fucked up.

    NO WONDER people aren’t engaging or following through. Because the part of you that grudgingly reaches for the credit card and shells out desperate money for THE MASTER KEY-BLUEPRINT that will “fix” you IS THE SAME PART THAT DOESNT ACTUALLY BELIEVE ANYTHING CAN REALLY CHANGE.

    What if instead we talk to the “higher self” or the part that feels good about life, self, and possibilities. I realise this was the stand out difference with this ecourse adventure – it spoke to the part of me that went YES – these guys are calling out the doom-and-gloom bollocks, making a joke about the sales-toilet-funnel and saying HEY it can be FUN and AWESOME and btw it’s ok to give a shit about people actually doing well and succeeding with what we want to teach them. We care, we can help you AND we are telling you from the beginning that you are awesome and brilliant and don’t need fixing, just PERMISSION to try things a different way.

    This was a great revelation for me. I don’t know what the answers are, but I want now to think about which part of the person am I engaging?
    Can I sell things to the higher self/awesome self not the desperate self? What does that look like, how does it work?

    would love to hear people’s thoughts on this!

    I have done too many training courses, including professional ones, where you realise that no-one cares really about your suceeding. Just about signing up. I think people are done with this cold commercialism and I’m heartened and inspired to find a home and community to dare to speak my truths and consider whole new ways. Thanks guys!

    • This topic was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by  Catherine Fox.
    • This topic was modified 8 years, 1 month ago by  Catherine Fox.

    Jutta Dobler

    @CatherineFox I love this post! And I feel exactly the same way. So done with being marketed to in a way that assumes that there is something wrong with me.
    And yet after reading your post i re-read the sales page I wrote and i am doing exactly the same. No wonder i don’t like what I did there. Kept on going over it and refining and changing but it just didn’t click.
    Now I know why!
    Thanks so much for writing this post 🙂



    Nice insights Catherine- I agree. It is nice to have our higher self talked to and attune to excitement rather than despair.


    Bradley Morris
    Mountain Guide

    What a powerful, insightful post @catherine_wildfox. I am so excited to see this conversation coming to light.

    @andyfreist and I have been working so hard to flush our sales experience of all the salesy, hypey, manipulative bull-crap. Lookin back at our previous launch, we can still spot elements of the old school way of selling.

    For example: Using scarcity.

    Scarcity is a necessary part of making sales. When people know a good deal is about to expire or that there are only 3 left, they act. However, if you give someone all the time in the world to make a choice, they make none.

    Our solution for this next launch is, we’re allowing people to register for June 20th start-date (250 max) OR they can pre-register for our late October start date at the June price, just incase the current timing isn’t right. If they wait til October, then the price will go up.

    This is true scarcity and it feels good.

    I love the idea of marketing to people’s yes’s!

    The balance here is to do it in a way that doesn’t over accentuate the hype. Because it would be easy to create a marketing piece that says:

    Do you wanna be a million bajillionaire?
    Then sign up for my course!!

    I believe what you, we, all of us are feeling and talking about here is an art-form that we’re all exploring. It’s very exciting because what’s going to happen as we all crack the code of authenticity is people are going to truly resonate when they stumble upon our creation.

    Instead of an anxiety filled “yes,” it will feel like a “sigh of relief, thank God you exist kinda yes.”

    I am stoked to see where this conversation leads. Thanks for getting the ball rolling!

    Can’t wait to see your newly remodelled sales page @jutta.


    Rick McGillicutty

    This post warms my heart. It’s so good to see conversations like this happening in the business world.

    I have made a lot of money selling to the wounded part in people. I’ve sold a lot of crap people didn’t need because of a false promise to fix them. But ya know what… it was never fulfilling. I felt like I was selling my soul.

    Now, I’ll only sell something I believe in and can truly get behind.

    I may not have as much money as I used to, but I sure do sleep better at night and feel better about myself. Feels good to have gotten my soul back!


    Lisa R

    This. I love this.

    Instead of making people feel like shit and flushing them down our toilet funnels, we can make them feel good, valuable, special, seen.

    It’s something I think we GEAers know, but to hear it articulated and crystallised in a post here feels really important.

    In a similar vein I notice I feel really uncomfortable about people selling ‘6-figure this’ and ‘7-figure that’. It’s because, for me, money isn’t an end goal; it’s a means to an end, that’s all. The focus on money rather than what that money could do or become, makes me feel kinda ill. And it’s that same feeling as when sales-y crap makes people feel like shit.

    Thank you for the reminder of why I’m doing what I’m doing, the way I’m doing it.

    And thank you for starting a different kind of conversation.





    Dr.Wayne Buckhanan

    Yes. This is a great articulation of what so many of us have felt.

    I think this is part of what has had me “stuck” for a decade of sort-of kind-of marketing my courses. I knew *how* to do all the IM junk, but consistently avoided doing it.

    Thank you, Catherine, for saying it so clearly.
    And thank you, Bradley and Andy, for creating this space for us all to play and explore and grow out of the fertilizer that we’re all being steeped in by others!


    Skeeter Medias

    One time my bruther Doober tricked me inta buyin his dead gold fish. He said it wuz a circus fish that could swim on its back and that if I bot it t’day i’d likely git rich cuz the circus wuz comin ta town that week and they wuz lookin fur just that kinda act. So I paid’em all the money I saved up from cleanin the gater pen that year and when I took my lil dead fish to the circus manager to show’em my fishes act, they all laughed at me. I felt perdy dumb. and Sad. Ever since then, i realized that i just wanna help people feel good, even if Im sellin thm sumethin. I also never buy nothin from Doober no more.


    Luma Malone

    @catherine_wildfox Hey! Thanks for writing and posting our conversation …. wow, so cool to feel and see the ripple effect here.  i’m seeing the beneficial effect of simple conversation, nothing mind blowing or fancy, just two people relaxing and conversing with no agenda other than to enjoy ourselves and each other’s good company. Maybe it’s that simple, that easy and that profoundly ordinary.

    I’ve been part of an evolutionary and transparent communication practice circle here in Victoria for several years. The practice is simple: evolve together through conversation. The magic happens when conversation opens into a state of communion. Simply relaxing in each other’s presence. Nothing to do. Nothing to prove. Not much to say. Just here together in co-creative WE Space. OPen and available to what ever is emerging through us. Allowing ourselves to simply be in the wonder of everything happening in the space between us.  And we all feel some unnameable needs being deeply nourished, a deep sense of well being.

    This is where i feel, as you wrote, @bradleytmorris “Instead of an anxiety filled “yes,” it will feel like a “sigh of relief, thank God you exist kinda yes”

    So as i’m thinking about writing my new paradigm invitation to feel the sigh of relief and experience something new, (formerly known as the killer sales pitch in old paradigm lingo) I might include things like: As a guide/facilitator, I do not dispense information or things to make you feel better. I pronounce an invocation: I call forth the wisdom in you. I offer you my whole hearted attention. An invitation to begin a new conversation and enter the state of communion. A comfortable resting place that says ‘You are welcome here. Come in. Relax. Just be yourself.” It’s time to play, dance, sing, celebrate, be goofy, try stuff you’ve never done before. Honor and respect your fear. Love your resistance. Give permission to feel more of everything.


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