This weekend, I’m going to do a @saramccann and catch up on everyone else’s writing. I keep seeing the comments, so know that it is pure gold.

I have completed tonight’s writing. 1,118 words. I will need to do some editing I think, before I post it on my blog. But I’m relatively happy with it.  Thought I’d share it here:

Breastfeeding twins is really rather wonderful, and when I see a happy breastfeeding relationship between a mother and her babies, well that just brings me joy.

Today I spent time with a new mum. Her twin boys are three weeks old. She called me at the beginning of the week because her nipples were hurting and she didn’t want to cause herself any damage. She had been exclusively breastfeeding her twins since birth. It’s hard to find the women that manage to only give their babies breastmilk. This isn’t because they don’t want to, it is, rather, the received wisdom of the healthcare professionals that she won’t be able to breastfeed twins. This is a common thought. So many twin babies are ‘topped up’ and ‘supplemented’ from birth simply for being twins.

I remember being discharged from hospital and finally being able to take my twins home. I say finally, I had been in hospital for a week prior to their birth, due to my high risk of pre-eclampsia, and then a week after their birth. No one asked me how my breastfeeding relationship had been with my first three children. There was an assumption, or perhaps just a lack of knowledge, that meant my new babies were tube fed formula milk. I didn’t know any different. I just thought that that was how it went. When they were several days old, and my wee daughter had pulled out her tube for the umpteenth time, a midwife told me that I wouldn’t be allowed to go home whilst she was still feeding from a tube. So, I put my baby to the breast and fed her. I can’t decide if it’s funny, frustrating or just plain sad that I didn’t know that I was ‘allowed’ to breastfeed my own babies. On arriving home, the first midwife to visit me did not bring joy to my home. Instead she asked me why I was home, my blood pressure was still incredibly high, and then she told me that because it was twins, I would not be able to breastfeed because I wouldn’t have enough milk. This was a woman who clearly knew nothing about breastfeeding. Surely it makes sense that a multiple mama, a twin mum, would make more milk than a singleton mum. The more a baby feeds, the more milk she makes. Within the breast milk is a hormone, the Feedback Inhibitor of Lactation. When a baby feeds from the breast, the Feedback Inhibitor of Lactation, or FIL as we’ll call it, goes down. As the FIL goes down, the message goes to the brain to make more milk. Now, with a singleton mum, the baby tends to feed from one breast at a time. Therefore the FIL lowers in one breast and the message goes to the brain to say make more milk for that breast. So, doesn’t it make sense that a mother breastfeeding twins will have the FIL levels drop in BOTH of her breasts, causing the message to the brain to say ‘make more milk’. So there will be more milk in TWO breasts.

Do I think that breastfeeding twins should be easy? Yes. Do I think that some women have issues and need more support? Yes. But let me tell you about today’s client.

I arrived at her home and she was in bed with her babies. They had finished feeding before I arrived, but one was fussing a little and mum put him to her breast. She asked me if she was doing it right. I asked her how it felt and she told me that it felt good. Then she explained how she checked. She would press on her breast and roll the baby slightly out. I suggested that instead of rolling the baby off the breast and down onto the nipple, she try rolling the baby in and smudging him in well. Because she wasn’t holding the back of his head, he was able to hinge his head back if he was too far in to the breast. She continued to feed him well. The only other adjustment that I suggested was that she allow the baby to come up from underneath the breast to allow his mouth to fully open. She smiled at me immediately and said that just that tiny thing made the feeding seem so much better. Her baby fed until he was ready to stop. The second twin then decided that he was fed up of missing the action and also needed a feed. Mum asked if we could go downstairs so that she could show me how she set herself up. So, we took the babies downstairs and mum took the pregnancy pillow that she was using with her. She showed me a twin pillow that she had tried to use but failed as she didn’t like the way if sat on/around her body. When she decided that it was too uncomfortable, she played around with her pregnancy pillow and sat back, with her feet up and fed the second baby. I just sat with her, telling her how fabulous she was, explaining about FIL and basically just being. I asked how she was feeling and she said that prior to my visit she was continually hunching and tensing her shoulders whilst feeding. She tried hard to sit upright, but I explained that it wasn’t necessary to sit upright, but that leaning back was easier. And it proved to be so for her. When I left, both her and her partner were grinning. She said ‘You’re leaving happy people behind you. Thank you.’

Sometimes we spend so much time doing the checklists, eg position the baby here, turn your arm there, sit up straight etc that we forget to simply be and let the babies feed. I told my client that the reason I didn’t position her babies or put my hands on her or the babies was because I wouldn’t be there at 3am in the morning to fix the positioning. By leaving her to sort herself and her babies, she was able to see that it was what she herself was capable of. By talking to her with words of love and encouragement, she stepped further into her motherhood. She was doing a brilliant job when I arrived. There was nothing to fix, just because I was there. I was there simply to be. There will be times when my clients need more from me than words of encouragement and they will get that which they need. But it’s so fabulous to see something that was working and to walk away knowing that by doing nothing, I helped a mum do everything.

Thank you @laurakoller I think that I’m going to just upload that to my blog and use it as promotional information for my eCourse. I need to read through my notes and see whether it’s going to be a public blog, or a read this and sign up blog. Trying to decide if there’s enough of a disclaimer around my views that breastfeeding should be simple.

Also need to let my mind move towards this evening’s writing.

Ladies you are so lovely. Thank you @laurakoller and you as well @judyb for taking the time to search out my writing.

Here is today’s writing. I’m not supposed to work on a Sunday, but I got special dispensation from the Wife (my best birth buddy and close friend).

Today is Sunday and the Wife and I (my best birth buddy and one of my closest friends) took the decision a month or so ago, NOT to work on Sundays. So when I told her that I still had to keep up the November challenge and write every day, she said that I couldn’t write about work. Gah! Then what will I write about?

I poured myself a glass of red. No. Not Malbec. A lovely Tempranillo that was given to me by one of my Abuelitas (my course is Abuela Doulas, when it’s been completed, the doulas are known to me as Abuelitas). It was time to let the words flow and grab that germ of an idea that hit me a short while ago.

Earlier today I went to my local theatre to see a couple of pieces that have been written. It’s called a Script Accelerator – the pieces are written, brainstormed and developed there. The writers have to submit their scripts and some are chosen to be worked on. There were two pieces tonight. One was about a hate crime, the other about depression. As a Trustee of my local theatre, I feel it important that I get to see these things and support them. It’s always an interesting evening. After the performances, which are staged readings, there is a feedback question and answer session. These are valuable for the playwrights as they get to hear what an audience thinks about their work and can adjust different parts and or be pleased about what they’ve written.

I like being at my theatre. It’s a lovely space to work in. I can watch people, hear people and yet not be distracted in the way that I am at home. Dishes to wash, laundry to do, box sets to watch. Did I say that last one out loud? I think that working in a theatre allows my creative juices to flow. But I mustn’t go further along that train of thought, else the Wife will find out and I’ll be guilty of working on a Sunday. We’re planning (and by we I mean SHE) to extend it to not working on Saturdays as well, and then she said Fridays!!)

Whilst I’m thinking about the theatre, I thought I’d let you know how I became so interested in the theatre. It was my sixth form English teacher, Miss Cartwright. Oh this woman didn’t suffer fools gladly and she didn’t let us get away with anything. She could eviserate you in moment. No one wanted to be on the end of that. I remember a quote from a play, possibly ‘Waiting for Godot’ by Samuel Beckett. It said ‘hope defers makes the heart sick’. She turned to me, she knew that I went to church, and asked me where it was in the Bible. I didn’t have a clue. Oh my but that was not the right answer. She asked how I could possibly call myself a Christian and not know my Scripture. For those that don’t know, it’s Proverbs 13:12. I rarely forget that now. Jan Cartwright would be proud.

None of that tells you how my love of the theatre grew. It was because Ms Cartwright, Jan as we were finally allowed to call her, would take us to the theatre and then back to her flat where we would have cheese, wine and crackers and discuss the plays. Oh my goodness but we felt so grown up. We were intelligent adults, discussing plays and drinking wine with an intelligent adult. I have always loved reading. Even now I have more than one book on the go. Of course I have about half a dozen birth books on the go, but I always have a couple of books of fiction on the go as well. My reading pile never shrinks, no matter how much I read. There is not enough life to read all the books that I desire to read. As a young woman that loved reading, going the the theatre was a natural progression. Being made to feel like an intelligent adult, by a woman I greatly respected, was life changing. I remember seeing Shakespeare’s ‘A Comedy of Errors’. The protagonists were completely blue. That’s right, COMPLETELY blue. Head to toe. It was fabulous. And then we saw a production of ‘Waiting for Godot’. My best friend practically snored through it. I loved it. Reading Ibsen’s ‘A Doll’s House’ was brilliant. Hearing that the ending was changed when it was first performed in Germany was outrageous. They refused to accept that a wife would leave her husband. The feminist in me began to rise. The thoughts and feelings that I had had for years were validated through that text. It remains one of my favourite plays.

I go to the theatre as much as I can. And I love it. For me it is the perfect self-care and I always factor that in to my plans. For my Golden birthday I asked for theatre vouchers. Some friends bought me theatre tickets to plays that I wanted to see, so that they could come with me. It continues to bring me joy and make my oxytocin levels rise.

Fast forward to now. I am on the Board of two theatres and have been approached to apply to be the Chair of a third. Not bad for a girl that thought drinking wine and eating crackers in a flat in Barnes was the height of grown up sophistication.

Thank you @davidj You say the nicest things.

Just pondering on this evening’s writing and have the group coaching call to fit in as well.